At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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