Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
The beers last night were like the tears from god
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
