I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I showed him my bush... on skype.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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