So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize
