in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
