its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
