I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
