woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
