Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks