Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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