Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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