Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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