I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
