Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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