Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
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You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
there is glitter all over my balls
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