I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
