I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up