Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize