he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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