I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
