you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
i think my cat just said my name.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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