walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
