Tell her she can't have a vagina
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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