so that wasnt chicken after all
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
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