Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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