he wants to bone in the snuggie
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize