miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
