the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
