In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
