just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
