Will you blow on my dice?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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