One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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