She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
