what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
