Your tits are I can't wait for
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
