I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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