Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Randomize
