just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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