You can't motorboat a personality
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
