I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I understand Curling. That high.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
