My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Randomize
