I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize