He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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