Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize