Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize