i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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