Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
if i can run in heels then i can drive
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
