Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
