So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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