I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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